Big Oil Says “Our Profits are Obscene”

OK, that title is pure creative license. And it’s still April Fools, according to my clock anyway. But when I saw the real USA Today headline: “At Hearing, Big Oil Says its Profits Aren’t Extreme” I couldn’t help myself. I mean, if you had a blog, what would you write? Just give this a read:

Sure, $123 billion is chump change. I’m out there gasping for air whenever I fill my minivan, but what’s a few hundred billion among friends?

So then what do you think about $464 billion? That’s the profits of the top five oil companies in the United States since Bush entered the White House. You can’t make this stuff up.

But wait, there’s more! What about those tax subsidies set up for these “struggling” companies? At least in this arena there’s some decent news since Congress is trying to kill these tax breaks once and for all (you can send a friendly note to your representative via Public Citizen here).

So let’s summarize: $3 trillion for a war (that had nothing – wink wink – to do with oil), $billions of tax breaks, and a national energy policy hand-written by the Oil Industry itself. Woops, there’s also that little planetary emergency we’re facing.

I don’t envision any president as a superhero to swoop in and save the planet from the evil-doers. But honestly, when it comes to energy policy, I’ll take Dick Nixon over the criminal regime we’ve had for the last eight years.